Hormones Week 2

September 20, 2016

Hormones Week 2:

Days 7 – 12

*Disclaimer: The prescribed medicine, drugs, doses, results, and other related information is not to be used for medical advice, self-medicating, changing your nurses or physicians orders, or recommendations for your treatment. Each person, response to the cycle, and other health related facts can vary significantly. Different variations of responses and outcomes can occur from person to person based on health, age factors, and other circumstances. These details are just the medical facts from my stimulation and cycle. None of this information should be used to compare or contrast your instructions or progress.

Hormones Day 7 (Friday)

“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.” –John F. Kennedy

Today was the final day of the Storyline Conference. This conference was exactly what I needed this week. Motivational speakers, empowering lectures, and leadership presentations seem to be exactly what I needed to hear to stay positive during this egg freezing journey. I wasn’t as excited about getting dressed this morning however. It seemed that over night I had increased in size and finding an outfit was getting more challenging by the day.

I started the day with my Ganirelix shot to prevent ovulation and then made myself a protein shake. We gathered our stuff and headed off to the conference. The irony of it all was how after a week of hormones and shooting myself with 3 different medications each day I felt like everyone looked at me different.

I probably was making it all up in my head, but I felt like I was being stared at or watched. I was extremely self-conscious. I’m usually never worried about what people thought or said, but today I was ultra sensitive. I think this is normal to feel so emotional during this stage. I had just altered the chemical makeup of my body to trick it into thinking it was preparing for a baby. But all these raw emotions I had never felt before, so there is also a virgin aspect of going through this with an element of surprise. You really don’t know what to expect and everyone reacts differently to these drugs.

When the conference concluded, I couldn’t wait to get back into the car and unzip my jeans. I give up I told myself. I’m just going to wear my loose black sport pants and hike them up past my waistline from this point forward. The pain of pressure on my abdomen was not worth it anymore. Fashion might as well have gone out the window. It is not like I had maternity clothes just laying around I could put on. I guess that is what pregnant soon-to-be moms start to feel like when they reach that point in their pregnancy where putting on fashionable clothes that can fit them seems impossible, you just want to be comfortable to make it through your day.

As I prepared my usual medications of 150 iu Menopur and Follistim that night, I said a little prayer for all the women out there struggling to get pregnant in the first place. I thought about all the women before me that never had this opportunity to freeze their eggs or be able to afford to complete this elective procedure. I spent some time reading that night and reflecting on all the positive things in my life. I wanted to start a gratitude list and writing down all of the things I was thankful for. The Thanksgiving holiday was not far away and while I was not feeling my hottest, I also realized how blessed I really am.

Hormones Day 8 (Saturday)

“Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be.” – Sonia Ricotti

Getting up before the crack of dawn on a Saturday to make my morning monitor visit after a weeks worth of hormones is dedication let me tell you. I started to realize how cycle monitoring was a full time job. I didn’t want to wear clothes especially around my mid section as it became increasingly uncomfortable. I quickly gave myself my morning shot of Ganirelix and prepared to bike to the clinic. This morning’s bike ride seemed to hurt ten-fold as every bump rippled through my body. I often found myself standing straight up on my petals while biking very slowly crawl. It was also very cold and brisk this time in the morning.

The regular familiar faces were not at the clinic today. In fact, everyone I saw seemed to be different or new. I do realize I am going to the second largest fertility clinic in the United States and it takes a lot of people to keep a well oiled ship as big as this one moving, but I spent a little extra time getting to know each new medical professional I came in contact with. It was Saturday so I had no plans, but resting and enjoying some down time with my cousin/family after this so I wasn’t in a hurry.

I learned during this appointment that I had many follicles over 10mm big and they needed to reach over 15mm to be mature enough, but often times if they got larger than 20mm they would be too mature and not make the freeze either. However there are no guarantees that the smaller follicles could catch up in time or that the medicine would impact the larger already fast growing follicles. It was very informative and made me look at my ultrasound different than before. It was odd how the ultrasound probe was slightly relaxing and soothing as it seemed to massage my aching ovaries, that is until she quickly switched sides and I jolted off the table from the sudden movement. Had to laugh at the situation, as it is just another day for confessions of the egg freezer.

Later that day the nurse called from the office to give me my official results for the day:

Ultrasound results (23 follicles of interest)
Right Ovary: 15mm, 15mm, 14mm, 14mm, 13.5mm, 13mm, 13mm, 12mm, 12mm, 11.5mm, 11mm, 10.5mm, 10mm, 10mm, 10mm
Left Ovary: 18mm, 18mm, 17mm, 11mm, 11mm, 10.5mm, 9.9mm, 9.1mm

Blood work results
Estrogen = 1624
Progesterone = 0.701
LH = 5.3

Hormones Day 9 (Sunday)

“There are no facts, only interpretations.” –Friedrich Nietzsche

Another early morning bike ride racing the clinic to monitor my progress. The crisp air had a chill to it, but was also refreshing. My hormones are increasingly raging and my breast tenderness was at an all time high. Would have to admit I think this was the first signs of my first emotional breakdown cry session for no reason I may add.

Momentarily felt sorry for myself that I didn’t have a boyfriend or husband to do this with me or help me through the process. Then reminded myself that it was exactly because I didn’t have a boyfriend or husband that I was doing this in the first place and that in some convoluted way this. Time magically slows down, and your entire perspective on life flies out the window. My mind working overtime, just couldn’t switch off. My appetite was completely gone and I spent the day picking at scraps of anything I could stomach.

By that time the nurse from the office was calling about my official results for day 9:

Ultrasound results (18 follicles of interest)
Right Ovary: 18.9mm, 18.6mm, 18.6mm, 18.4mm, 16.9mm, 15.9mm, 15.8mm, 15.6mm, 15.5mm, 14.8mm, 14.5mm
Left Ovary: 19.9mm, 18.1mm, 17.4mm, 15.5mm, 11.2mm, 10.7mm, 10.7mm

Blood work results
Estrogen = 2212
Progesterone = 0.821
LH = 6.58

Hormones Day 10 (Monday)

“New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings.” -Lao Tzu

Biking today became significantly more challenging. I learned at my daily monitoring appointment today that my right ovary sits much higher than my left. That would explain some of my belly bulge shift on my right side that was higher than my waistline. It also might mean that it would be harder to retrieve the follicles and eggs from that side. After my appointment I went to my office for meetings all day, so remained pretty distracted. By now, the side effects of the drugs were starting to get me down. I could throw dressing cute right out the window. I could barely stand the clothes that were on my body. Everything seemed to hurt. After work I went home and relaxed with a hot bath and went to bed early. I was so tired and worn out that I missed the phone call from my clinic with my results.

Here are the results they left on my voicemail:

Ultrasound results (22 follicles of interest)
Right Ovary: 20.7mm, 19.5mm, 17.8mm, 17.1mm, 15.3mm, 15mm, 15mm, 13.2mm, 13.2mm, 11.8mm, 11.6mm, 10.7mm, 9.3mm, 8.2mm, 7.2mm
Left Ovary: 23.1mm, 20mm, 18.6mm, 14.3mm, 13.2mm, 13mm, 11.4mm

Blood work results
Estrogen = 3001
Progesterone = 0.781
LH = 1.94

My Day 11 Cycle (Tuesday)

“When I let go of what I am I become what I might be.” – Lao Tzu

I was getting increasingly excited, as this morning monitoring exam could be the last of the last ones before my retrieval. I was feeling super bloated, uncomfortable and anxious for the retrieval to happen. The ultrasound tech quickly wraps up and confirmed that I would be ready for egg collection on Thursday. The weekend dragged by in a fairly monotonous manner. I had been over analyzing every sensation and convinced myself that I could last a few more days. My mind had been playing tricks on me for the past 24 hours and I was dreaming the weirdest things. I took it easy after work and tried to drink a lot of water.

Here are the results from my monitoring visit and day 11 medications:

Ultrasound results (23 follicles of interest)
Right Ovary: 26mm, 23mm, 23mm, 22mm, 20mm, 18mm, 17.5mm, 15mm, 15mm, 14mm, 13.5mm, 12mm, 11mm, 11mm
Left Ovary: 27mm, 25mm, 22mm, 17.5mm, 14.5mm, 14mm, 14mm, 12mm, 10mm

Blood work results
Estrogen = 4246
Progesterone = 0.912
LH = 1.80

My Day 12 Cycle (Wednesday)

“Live as if you were living a second time, and as though you had acted wrongly the first time.” –Viktor E. Frankl

Today was highly emotional for me as it is my grandparents’ 67^th wedding anniversary. I was feeling very tired this morning after getting up at 4 am to administer the first part of my trigger shot. It was rather hard to give myself the series of trigger shots because it had to go into the muscle of my butt. That reach around especially half asleep at 4 am was rather challenging. I had to return to the clinic later that morning for blood work only.

As the day progressed my joints, tailbone, stomach and other body parts really ached. I was only sitting down, but I really wanted to be home safely in my bed and curling up in the fetal position with my 4 lb Yorkie dog for comfort. I was told that I was at risk for hyperstimulation and that I needed to take it easy. Ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome (OHSS) is a medical condition affecting the ovaries of some women who take fertility medication to stimulate egg growth. Most cases are mild, but rarely the condition is severe and can lead to serious illness or death. Today I felt aching sensation or pain on both sides of my ovaries. I was told that my ovaries were larger than the size of oranges at this point. No wonder they ached and felt tender to the touch.

The nurse said my blood work was just on the cusp of hyperstimulation and to relax before my retrieval the next day.

Blood work results
HCG = 33
Progesterone = 3.34
LH = 200